Polygamist families on Oprah- Should...

[Evanescence]

Polygamy be legalized?

If we're gonna have civil unions and/or same sex marriages, why not polygamy?

If a man and a woman can live together for years, thus creating a 7 year civil live in statute, why can't a man have more than one wife.

Now, before someone says its a sin to have more than one wife....think again. Our old friend Pouye PROVED there is no Biblical stance on plural wives...one way or another. I challenge anyone to find it...

With sensible guidelines, should people be allowed to have plural marriages?

[VerbumReale]

Well I don't support the blessing of same-sex unions or polygamy. But really from biblical standpoint if we should bless same-sex unions, as unfortunately some of our church-bodies seem to think we should, then why not bless polgyamy also. I bring this up to people who disagree with me on my disapproval of blessing of same-sex unions and they will try to come up with some reason why polygamy is different.

[freakysoccer]

i too disagree with same sex marriage, but as said above, if that's gonna be legalized the polygamy should be too. and in my opinion the government has no right to tell you how you shoud choose a spouse or in this case spouses.

[middletree]

Ah, but if it were only that simple. The fact is that many modern polygamists group themselves together in what many would call cults, and these cults tend to teach their kids that arranged marriages are acceptable and God-approved. Then, they arrange (force) 13-year-old girls to marry much older men. That's the way it plays out in reality. It's not like "Big Love" at all.

[middletree]

A much more important question springs to mind:

Why the heck are you watching Oprah?

[Evanescence]

A much more important question springs to mind:

Why the heck are you watching Oprah?

hahah....good question Tree,

Ummm...lets see, it was on after Dr. Phil????????????

[middletree]

Ummm...lets see, it was on after Dr. Phil????????????
You do realize that admitting you watch Dr Phil makes it worse, not better?

If you admit to watching The View, I'm outta here.

[ausgirl]

I can not claim to be any expert on the subject, but from what I've seen of polygamy through docos, etc, it seems to be a closed environment allowing sick old men to prey on very young girls and have as many sexual partners as they like but call it okay.

[Evanescence]

You do realize that admitting you watch Dr Phil makes it worse, not better?

If you admit to watching The View, I'm outta here.

haha, hey Dr. Phil rules....takes no crap from anyone and calls it like it is...

I know someone is gonna say..."he doesn't lead them to God etc etc." He's doing the Lords work by helping people....thats all I know...

No really. If it looks interesting, I'll tune into Dr. Phil or Oprah when i'm cooking for the wife. I'm home in the afternoons now so I have things ready for her when she comes home...

I was interested in what the Polygamists had to say. Despite claims of incest, child abuse and cults...there are A LOT of very happy, normal polygamists out there. Our world, even Christians....marriages are failing. if they can survive and flourish....raising solid families then I don't know if its such a bad thing. Its against the law but if it wasn't ....I would be willing to bet a lot of people would change their minds about the practice....especially men...lol....

[VerbumReale]

Ah, but if it were only that simple. The fact is that many modern polygamists group themselves together in what many would call cults, and these cults tend to teach their kids that arranged marriages are acceptable and God-approved. Then, they arrange (force) 13-year-old girls to marry much older men. That's the way it plays out in reality. It's not like "Big Love" at all.

Oh, but actually it might just be that simple.


Truthfully what we see on "Big Love" is probably more the norm than you realize. I saw a documentary on polygamy and there were interviews conducted with Utah police officers and they said that polygamy is so rampant in that state that they can't even come close to enforcing it. They said the only instances where they enforce it is when there is known abuse such as what you mentioned, and that is why people think that the norm is the cult-ish, compounds ala Warren Jeffs, or in the case of "Big Love," Roman Grant. And these police officers said that in those cases the people are charged with polygamy, but it's actually the abuse that the police are going after. They estimated that at least 75% of the polygymous families in Utah are families that are living in what many would consider to be perfectly normal, healthy, functional environments.

[EmmoGomer]

My hubby just said Polygamy should be really be called insanity http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/confused009.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)!! Ruuuuuuuuun run for the hills http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/scared007.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)!

[cheewiee]

My hubby just said Polygamy should be really be called insanity http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/confused009.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)!! Ruuuuuuuuun run for the hills http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/scared007.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)!

Exactly...

I don't want more than one wife... I have enough with the one that I have.

And women, when they get together ALWAYS, without fail team up against the man. Why would any man want to give them that advantage?

[VerbumReale]

Exactly...

I don't want more than one wife... I have enough with the one that I have.

And women, when they get together ALWAYS, without fail team up against the man. Why would any man want to give them that advantage?


Right, I agree. One wife is quite enough for me also. I am not suggesting that polygamy should be legalized. My point was, with so many people in our culture advocating for gay-marriage, and using the argument that there are gay couples (including couples with children) living in healthy, functional environments, then those same people should have no problem with polygymous marriages, and yet more often than not, somehow they think polygamy is different.

Personally I don't think either one of them should be legalized, at least not with the word 'marriage.'

[TN3Dmom]

I watch Big Love and although I know nothing about polygamy it seems pretty real to me. Neither of the spouses seem particularly happy. And (is it Bob??) the husband seems stressed beyond belief at all times. I guess that's the trade off of being able to sleep with three wives, you also get the drama that goes with it. Women can be ridiculous sometimes and I would imagine living with three and trying to please them all would drive a man insane.:rolleyes:

[kiwisongbird]

Living here in my house of men - the thought of having a minor wife in the home doesn't seem too bad at times - I 'd have someone to go shopping with, someone to chat with when I'm in the kitchen - and maybe a bit of competition at times wouldn't be too bad a thing - oh but Kevin wouldn't be able to hold a position in the church though! :) :)

I wouldn't like to be a minor wife though - it would only work if I was the one in charge! Oh, there you go - the biggest problem with too many women in a home - that alpha female thing happening!

Maybe it's not such a good idea after all! :)

[Evanescence]

I watch Big Love and although I know nothing about polygamy it seems pretty real to me. Neither of the spouses seem particularly happy. And (is it Bob??) the husband seems stressed beyond belief at all times. I guess that's the trade off of being able to sleep with three wives, you also get the drama that goes with it. Women can be ridiculous sometimes and I would imagine living with three and trying to please them all would drive a man insane.:rolleyes:

Isn't Big Love a fictious TV show.....????????????

Any man that says he wouldn't give Polygamy a thought if it wasn't legalized, is lying...myself included....

Women are wonderful, loving creatures that are to be adored and embraced by men. I can't blame a man for wanting to have more than one wife and would probably do so if it were legal and a normal part of society. Thats just my honest opinion...

[SacredHeart]

I think what disturbs me the most is the oppression of the women. Their lives revolve completely and entirely around their husbands. To not be permitted to pursue one's dreams outside of the family is just another form of abuse. What saddens me the most is that these women don't have dreams outside of their husbands and children because they've never been allowed to dream that big. These women are so brain-washed they don't know any better. To me it's just a legitimized way for a man to be a horndog without being called one.

[Evanescence]

I think what disturbs me the most is the oppression of the women. Their lives revolve completely and entirely around their husbands. To not be permitted to pursue one's dreams outside of the family is just another form of abuse. What saddens me the most is that these women don't have dreams outside of their husbands and children because they've never been allowed to dream that big. These women are so brain-washed they don't know any better. To me it's just a legitimized way for a man to be a horndog without being called one.

I agree and it shouldn't be that way. But, how many good outstanding, conservative Christians do we know that are doing exactly the same thing?

I know MANY...I live near Amish, Brethren and Mennonite families and this is VERY common. They're taught that women were put here to serve man and must be submissive, etc etc. Its abuse of the Bible for selfish reasons...

But, in either case it should never be that way....

[Jason]

Isn't Big Love a fictious TV show.....????????????

Any man that says he wouldn't give Polygamy a thought if it wasn't legalized, is lying...myself included....

Women are wonderful, loving creatures that are to be adored and embraced by men. I can't blame a man for wanting to have more than one wife and would probably do so if it were legal and a normal part of society. Thats just my honest opinion...

All men aren't like you, John. Seriously.

[clemsontigers23]

All men aren't like you, John. Seriously.

Agreed. Some men actually love their wife and kids enough to not put them through that. 98% of Christians observe the "one man and one woman" command given by God, and if they don't, they're probably not really Christians anyways.

I don't think polygamy should be legalized, even if homosexuality is legal. Two wrongs don't make a right.

[VerbumReale]

Isn't Big Love a fictious TV show.....????????????

Any man that says he wouldn't give Polygamy a thought if it wasn't legalized, is lying...myself included....

Women are wonderful, loving creatures that are to be adored and embraced by men. I can't blame a man for wanting to have more than one wife and would probably do so if it were legal and a normal part of society. Thats just my honest opinion...


Well I seriously don't think that I would consider it, but even if I did just slightly entertain it, my wife would completely put the kibash on it by telling me if I wanted a new wife then I would lose the one I have now. At that point I would lose interest.

[Evanescence]

All men aren't like you, John. Seriously.


I disagree....Its just that most aren't as honest. I bet there are some studies out there that would show 80% or higher....men would have more than one wife if it was socially acceptable and legal.

Men are genetically programmed to pursue....to pursue women. Its what we do. Our emotional bonds aren't the same as women so sharing our love with more than one woman isn't a problem. For women its completley different, however, many and I do mean many women have wondered what it'd be like to have more than one man. These are natural urges...sinful even at times, but nonetheless, natural. Natural for men and women among believers and non-believers. Its just that many Christians are so dishonest, they won't admit that their actually human-- careful to protect their reputation.



Put through what? Whats normal to you and I, isn't normal to others...and vice versa. Polygamists probably think that OUR lives aren't normal...and theirs are. Where's the reference point? Who decides whats normal and whats not. You? Me?

The Bible is NOT clear at all about the subject. Pouye proved that in several posts about 1 year ago. Heck, even i thought that God would have soemthing clear to say about it, but its not. In fact, I now say this:

God always does whats right. God is always looking out for us...sins are destructive....its just logical. So, IF Polygamy were a destructive, horrible thing that wrecks lives etc etc, it would clearly be discussed, and a sin. But, its not. I think that people DO exploit and opress women through it, but they do this through just about anything anyway. Including their worship of the Bible. Christians with their clear distortion of the Bible have oppressed women for thousands of years, so they have no room to point fingers at Polygamists.

However, I am not sure it should be legalized. I just don't know. I think there's a LOT of unanswered questions and serious guidelines that would have to be followed. But, really, we can't label it as sinful. I really just don't know.

Me, I would NOT puruse a 2nd wife if all of a sudden it were legalized. I love my wife very much and thats not soemthing she would like, which I understand. But, if it were legal and I was single...and it was common, I really would have to think twice about NOT having more than one wife. But, that will never happen so....whatever...

I'm jsut being honest, thats all. Let the rock throwing begin....

*Put on double lines foil hat for protection*

[Psycho Mom]

I watched this Oprah show and they were talking more about decriminalizing it vs making it legal. My husband would be crazy if he had more than one wife. I have put him half way there already.

[clemsontigers23]

I disagree....Its just that most aren't as honest. I bet there are some studies out there that would show 80% or higher....men would have more than one wife if it was socially acceptable and legal.

Men are genetically programmed to pursue....to pursue women. Its what we do. Our emotional bonds aren't the same as women so sharing our love with more than one woman isn't a problem. For women its completley different, however, many and I do mean many women have wondered what it'd be like to have more than one man. These are natural urges...sinful even at times, but nonetheless, natural. Natural for men and women among believers and non-believers. Its just that many Christians are so dishonest, they won't admit that their actually human-- careful to protect their reputation.

Agreed. Some men actually love their wife and kids enough to not put them through that. 98% of Christians observe the "one man and one woman" command given by God, and if they don't, they're probably not really Christians anyways.

I don't think polygamy should be legalized, even if homosexuality is legal. Two wrongs don't make a right.]

Put through what? Whats normal to you and I, isn't normal to others...and vice versa. Polygamists probably think that OUR lives aren't normal...and theirs are. Where's the reference point? Who decides whats normal and whats not. You? Me?

The Bible is NOT clear at all about the subject. Pouye proved that in several posts about 1 year ago. Heck, even i thought that God would have soemthing clear to say about it, but its not. In fact, I now say this:

God always does whats right. God is always looking out for us...sins are destructive....its just logical. So, IF Polygamy were a destructive, horrible thing that wrecks lives etc etc, it would clearly be discussed, and a sin. But, its not. I think that people DO exploit and opress women through it, but they do this through just about anything anyway. Including their worship of the Bible. Christians with their clear distortion of the Bible have oppressed women for thousands of years, so they have no room to point fingers at Polygamists.

However, I am not sure it should be legalized. I just don't know. I think there's a LOT of unanswered questions and serious guidelines that would have to be followed. But, really, we can't label it as sinful. I really just don't know.

Me, I would NOT puruse a 2nd wife if all of a sudden it were legalized. I love my wife very much and thats not soemthing she would like, which I understand. But, if it were legal and I was single...and it was common, I really would have to think twice about NOT having more than one wife. But, that will never happen so....whatever...

I'm jsut being honest, thats all. Let the rock throwing begin....

*Put on double lines foil hat for protection*

This has got to be the most ill-advised post you've ever posted. The Bible's not clear about marriage? Are we reading the same Bible?

"And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" Genesis 2:23-24

How can a man and a woman become one if a man has more than one wife?

"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" Matthew 19:6

The most clear passage supporting one man and one woman is this:

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh" Ephesians 5:31

Also, once again, don't assume 80% of guys would do it. Many guys have been able to master their sexual and lustful desires thanks to the love of Jesus Christ. Seems like you don't give Christians, or Christ, enough credit.

[ausgirl]

Living here in my house of men - the thought of having a minor wife in the home doesn't seem too bad at times - I 'd have someone to go shopping with, someone to chat with when I'm in the kitchen - and maybe a bit of competition at times wouldn't be too bad a thing - oh but Kevin wouldn't be able to hold a position in the church though! :) :)

I wouldn't like to be a minor wife though - it would only work if I was the one in charge! Oh, there you go - the biggest problem with too many women in a home - that alpha female thing happening!

Maybe it's not such a good idea after all! :)
Sharon, I know your post is in jest - could any of us imagine allowing our husbands to sleep with another woman and be happy about - I mean big love is probably a overdramatisation - they don't all have seperate lovely mansions, so you would know what's happening and when - yuck!

[ausgirl]

E, in all honesty, would you really want two wives meaning two well developed relationships or is it a sexual thing - what with the world making us think that everyman desires to be with more than one woman. Just that being a woman and all, I admit we can be hard to get along with sometimes and this just asks for trouble!

[ausgirl]

E, one final question - should your wife come home one day and state she would like to add another husband to your household, would that be okay with you? I find it interesting that this polygamy thing only seems to involve many wives with one husband and not viseversa.

And, no, I have not ever imagined, dreamed or fantasised of having more than one man as you suggest many of us do. And no, I am not lying to save face as a christian, this is the truth.

[ausgirl]

This has got to be the most ill-advised post you've ever posted. The Bible's not clear about marriage? Are we reading the same Bible?

"And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" Genesis 2:23-24

How can a man and a woman become one if a man has more than one wife?

"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" Matthew 19:6

The most clear passage supporting one man and one woman is this:

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh" Ephesians 5:31

Also, once again, don't assume 80% of guys would do it. Many guys have been able to master their sexual and lustful desires thanks to the love of Jesus Christ. Seems like you don't give Christians, or Christ, enough credit.
Nice post!

[Evanescence]

This has got to be the most ill-advised post you've ever posted. The Bible's not clear about marriage? Are we reading the same Bible?



Its clear on marriage but not polygamy. Show me where it gives permission or it forbids it....you can't. Its been subject for debate for centuries, this is why some still practice it...

Also, once again, don't assume 80% of guys would do it. Many guys have been able to master their sexual and lustful desires thanks to the love of Jesus Christ. Seems like you don't give Christians, or Christ, enough credit.


See, this is where YOU are assuming its all about sex. To some it may be, but to some its not at all. Really, i don't want to talk with you about it anymore becuase you are WAY too young to even know one thing about this stuff. Your not married so your input should be very little. But show me in the Bible where Polygamy is forbidden... In fact, i'll mail you $100.00 if you can....

I'm not promoting it or pushing it on anyone...in fact I said its too touchy of a subject to have it legal. But, as Christians...the Bible just isn't clear about the subject. Marriage its clear on, Polygamy its not.

E, in all honesty, would you really want two wives meaning two well developed relationships or is it a sexual thing - what with the world making us think that everyman desires to be with more than one woman. Just that being a woman and all, I admit we can be hard to get along with sometimes and this just asks for trouble!

BOTH! hey, lets be honest here. If it were legal and common, men would certainly entertain the thought. They did in the old days and still do. BUT, its not a sexual, pervert, horndog thing like some think. There are many Polygamist men who have MANY wives and love them all very much....perhaps the on equal planes. I don't know how I'd handle it...maybe it'd be a HUGE mistake, I dunno. But, I'm not going to sit here and lie that if I was single and it was common and legal, I'd not give it a thought.

E, one final question - should your wife come home one day and state she would like to add another husband to your household, would that be okay with you? I find it interesting that this polygamy thing only seems to involve many wives with one husband and not viseversa.

And, no, I have not ever imagined, dreamed or fantasised of having more than one man as you suggest many of us do. And no, I am not lying to save face as a christian, this is the truth.

It depends on how much money he was worth... :D

No, I certainly wouldn't go for that. AND...I wouldn't try to do the same with my wife. It'd be fairly easy i think to get away with....We could move to Utah and get to know some people and do the deed. But, that'd be wrong becuase my wife isn't in to that...and neither am I....in this situation. I'll never be in another situation, so its not even an issue. My wife with multiple husbands? hahah...I'd like to see that...

Sharon, I know your post is in jest - could any of us imagine allowing our husbands to sleep with another woman and be happy about - I mean big love is probably a overdramatisation - they don't all have seperate lovely mansions, so you would know what's happening and when - yuck!

Thats becuase of what we're taught...whats normal and whats not normal. But to some people, sharing of this nature isn't crazy, yucky or sick. Here's a quote from a woman i saw on TV a few months ago. She was discussing her plural arrangement...

"I am awakened in the middle of the night knowing my husband is being intimate with his other wife, my sister in marriage Kate. I can hear them. I shed a tear of joy and smile to sleep to know that they experiencing love and passion. I am not jealous but am happy for them. Tommorow she will be happy for me..."

To each his own i guess....

*Note- I'm done here for a while. I have a BIG project I'm working on and will be only on the web for a limited time for a little bit. I know you'll all miss me... :cool: **

[Jason]

I disagree....Its just that most aren't as honest. I bet there are some studies out there that would show 80% or higher....men would have more than one wife if it was socially acceptable and legal. their reputation.

...

I'm just being honest, thats all. Let the rock throwing begin....


John, please just speak for yourself then. It's not really fair to say other men are lying if they say they wouldn't want more than one wife.

[SueQ]

"And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" Genesis 2:23-24


"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" Matthew 19:6


"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh" Ephesians 5:31



This opens up a another can of worms: Let's say man is allowed to have more than one wife and they all become one flesh, doesn't that open up the possibility for a sexual relationship between the wives?

[SueQ]

Sorry to perpetuate a myth but I can see where some polgyamists would be open to that if not encouraging that...:rolleyes: ...

[clemsontigers23]

This opens up a another can of worms: Let's say man is allowed to have more than one wife and they all become one flesh, doesn't that open up the possibility for a sexual relationship between the wives?

A man's not allowed to have more than wife though, and this is the clincher piece of Scripture:

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh" Ephesians 5:31

I read that God allowed polygamy in the Old Testament to some extent, which must be where E is getting all of this, but nowhere in Scripture does it say that is the way God intended things to be. It was only allowed for certain reasons in the beginning of humanity, mainly because there were more women than men on earth. Now, we are NOT to have multiple wives and the Bible IS clear on this, whether E chooses to believe it or not.

[Evanescence]

This opens up a another can of worms: Let's say man is allowed to have more than one wife and they all become one flesh, doesn't that open up the possibility for a sexual relationship between the wives?

No not at all...

In fact, this one guy on the show explained that their intimacy is VERY private and they don't speak among themselves about certian things. This keeps a level of intimacy and a bond between the man and women...

A man's not allowed to have more than wife though, and this is the clincher piece of Scripture:

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh" Ephesians 5:31

I read that God allowed polygamy in the Old Testament to some extent, which must be where E is getting all of this, but nowhere in Scripture does it say that is the way God intended things to be. It was only allowed for certain reasons in the beginning of humanity, mainly because there were more women than men on earth. Now, we are NOT to have multiple wives and the Bible IS clear on this, whether E chooses to believe it or not.

I'll up to 200.00 ..... :cool:

While I agree with you in theory, the fact remains thats its NOT clear...

God permitted men to have more than one wife in the OT....we know that to be clear and true. BUT, when did it change? The Ephisians passage is correct but does NOT state that a man can "become one flesh" with more than one woman,....

Again, show us where/when it changed....????????????

Come on old friend....you can buy a pile of Jump 5 CDs with 200.00....:cool:

[clemsontigers23]

No not at all...

In fact, this one guy on the show explained that their intimacy is VERY private and they don't speak among themselves about certian things. This keeps a level of intimacy and a bond between the man and women...



I'll up to 200.00 ..... :cool:

While I agree with you in theory, the fact remains thats its NOT clear...

God permitted men to have more than one wife in the OT....we know that to be clear and true. BUT, when did it change? The Ephisians passage is correct but does NOT state that a man can "become one flesh" with more than one woman,....

Again, show us where/when it changed....????????????

Come on old friend....you can buy a pile of Jump 5 CDs with 200.00....:cool:

That's the thing...it is unclear when it changed, but what is clear is that God ever since sin entered this world has allowed certain sins to take place in order to work out a greater good in the world and to be according to His purpose, whatever that may be. I would love to be able to buy a pile of Jump5 CDs ;) but neither me or you know God's purpose. What is clear is that God has always intended one man and one woman to be the definition of marriage, and that now polygamy is recognized as a sin (except by the Mormons :rolleyes: )

I found this has a pretty good explanation:

Question: "Why did God allow polygamy / bigamy in the Bible?"

Answer: The first instance of polygamy / bigamy in the Bible was Lamech in Genesis 4:19, “Lamech married two women…” Several prominent men in the Old Testament were polygamists. Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines (essentially wives of a lower status) according to 1 Kings 11:3. What are we to do with these instances of polygamy in the Old Testament? There are three questions that need to be answered. (1) Why did God allow polygamy in the Old Testament? (2) How does God view polygamy today? (3) Why did it change?

(1) Why did God allow polygamy in the Old Testament? The Bible does not specifically say why God allowed polygamy. The best anyone can do is “informed” speculation. There are a few key items to consider. First, there has always been more women in the world than men. Current statistics show that approximately 50.5% of the world population are women, with men being 49.5%. Assuming the same percentages in ancient times, and multiplied by millions of people, there would be tens of thousands more women than men. Second, warfare in ancient times was especially brutal, with an incredibly high rate of fatality. This would have resulted in an even greater percentage of women to men. Third, due to the patriarchal societies, it was nearly impossible for a woman to provide for herself. Women were often uneducated and untrained. Women relied on their fathers, brothers, and husbands for provision and protection. Unmarried women were often subjected to prostitution and slavery. Fourth, the significant difference between the number of women and men would have left many, many women in an undesirable situation (to say the least).

So, it seems that God allowed polygamy to protect and provide for the women who could not find a husband otherwise. A man would take multiple wives, and serve as the provider and protector of all of them. While definitely not ideal, living in a polygamist household was far better than the alternatives: prostitution, slavery, starvation, etc. In addition to the protection / provision factor, polygamy enabled a much faster expansion of humanity, fulfilling God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth” (Genesis 9:7). Men are capable of impregnating multiple women in the same time period…causing humanity to grow much faster than if each man was only able to produce one child each year. Again, these are only “informed” speculations.

(2) How does God view polygamy today? The Bible says that God’s original intention was for one man to be married to only one woman, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife (not wives); and they shall become one flesh (not multiple fleshes)” (Genesis 2:24). We see in Deuteronomy 17:14-20, that the kings were not supposed to multiply wives. This most definitely puts Solomon in direct disobedience against the Lord.

In the New Testament, 1 Timothy 3:2, 12 and Titus 1:6 give “the husband of one wife” in a list of qualifications for spiritual leadership. While these qualifications are only specifically for positions of spiritual leadership, they apply equally to all Christians. Should not all Christians be “above reproach...temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money” (1 Timothy 3:2-4)? If we are called to be holy (1 Peter 1:16), and if these standards are holy for elders and deacons, then they are holy for all. Ephesians 5:22-33, speaking of the relationship between husbands and wives, when referring to a husband (singular) always also refers to a wife (singular). “…for the husband is the head of the wife (singular) … He who loves his wife (singular) loves himself. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife (singular), and the two will become one flesh … each one of you also must love his wife (singular) as he loves himself, and the wife (singular) must respect her husband.” There is absolutely no allowance for polygamy for followers of Jesus Christ.

(3) Why did it change? It is not as much God disallowing something He previously allowed as it is God restoring marriage to His original intent. According to Genesis 2:24, polygamy was not God’s original intent. God seems to have allowed polygamy to solve a problem…but it was God’s desire for the problem never to have occurred. In most modern societies, there is absolutely no need for polygamy. In most cultures today, women are able to provide for and protect themselves – removing the only “positive” aspect of polygamy. Are there some instances in which the allowance for polygamy would still apply today? Perhaps…but it is unfathomable that there would be no other possible solution. It is our firm belief that polygamy does not honor the intent and sanctity of marriage – and most importantly – does not honor God.

http://www.gotquestions.org/polygamy.html

[hochspeyer]

Sorry, YOU'RE WRONG. And the inference behind your statement is that women are somehow inferior to men.

Your turn to throw a rock- if you have the strength.

I'm sorry, I forgot to ask- how long is it that you were married? Jennifer and I just celebrated twenty years together.

[Jason]

Sorry, YOU'RE WRONG. And the inference behind your statement is that women are somehow inferior to men.


Thank you.

[middletree]

Sorry, YOU'RE WRONG. And the inference behind your statement is that women are somehow inferior to men.


Can't tell who this post is directed to.

[WeaselInYerFoot]

This is just speculation of course... but couldn't it be possible that since divorce was one of the big no-no's then the workaround was polygamy?

[hochspeyer]

Can't tell who this post is directed to.

So sorry, it is for Evanescence.

[middletree]

The idea that God "allowed" this not so clear-cut. I'm not sure He endorsed it nor did He ever say it was the most desirable thing. David had multiple wives, and it's very possible it contributed to some sort of sexual addiction, which culminated in his adultery. Solomon was the first king to allow idols into Israel, and many other kings did so afterward. Who introduced the idols? One of Solomon's wives. If he had been a one-woman man, things might have been very different.

One thing is indisputable: God never says anything positive about polygamy. He apparently allows it, just as He allows divorce--but only because we have hard hearts.

So it comes down to this: What kind of walk with God do you want to have? One where you are allowed to get away with whatever He lets you get away with, or one in which you care about what He says is best?

[sandyandporter]

The idea that God "allowed" this not so clear-cut. I'm not sure He endorsed it nor did He ever say it was the most desirable thing. David had multiple wives, and it's very possible it contributed to some sort of sexual addiction, which culminated in his adultery. Solomon was the first king to allow idols into Israel, and many other kings did so afterward. Who introduced the idols? One of Solomon's wives. If he had been a one-woman man, things might have been very different.

One thing is indisputable: God never says anything positive about polygamy. He apparently allows it, just as He allows divorce--but only because we have hard hearts.

So it comes down to this: What kind of walk with God do you want to have? One where you are allowed to get away with whatever He lets you get away with, or one in which you care about what He says is best?

Very nice post!

As for me.... I choose to follow what is best. For now it's celibacy but hopefully in the future it will be a wonderful marriage with ONE man! ;)

[mat1583]

So it comes down to this: What kind of walk with God do you want to have? One where you are allowed to get away with whatever He lets you get away with, or one in which you care about what He says is best?

Well, I've never seen anything where God says drinking wine is the best thing for you either, but I'm sure going to enjoy a fine glass of Cabernet :)

Edit: Not at this time of day. I have a glass near bedtime.

-washboard

[middletree]

Well, I've never seen anything where God says drinking wine is the best thing for you either, but I'm sure going to enjoy a fine glass of Cabernet :)

Edit: Not at this time of day. I have a glass near bedtime.

-washboard

Actually, there is a verse that says something positive about wine, but I can't recall it now.

But the point was, when we ask "is this allowed", it really comes across as "can I get away with this?" Again, I think God allows certain things that aren't in our best interest. I fail to see how multiple wives provides any benefits whatsoever.

[mat1583]

Actually, there is a verse that says something positive about wine, but I can't recall it now.



I know :) I wasn't being completely serious about that. Wine was used for celebrations, passover meals, and even to settle stomachs.

There are a lot of people, however, who try to use the same reasoning you outlined to prohibit a wide range of "gray areas", which eventually leads to a bunch of legalism that has no Biblical basis. For instance, a particular denomination does not use music in worship services because it only the voice, heart, and spirit are mentioned in the New Testament in regards to worship.

-washboard

[Evanescence]

Sorry, YOU'RE WRONG. And the inference behind your statement is that women are somehow inferior to men.

Your turn to throw a rock- if you have the strength.

I'm sorry, I forgot to ask- how long is it that you were married? Jennifer and I just celebrated twenty years together.

Sorry YOU'RE wrong....I actually think most women are superior to me. Men are far more likley to do selfish and cruel things to various creatures and each other. I'd give it a 60/40 women being nicer, kinder, more loving than men.

I'm not sure which post you were referring to though, so i can't comment. As for my wife and I, we've been married 2 1/2 years. I was married once before for 7 yrs. Only ever been with 3 women, do dishes, am a good listener, surpirise my wife often, give awesome foot/back rubs and am never late for dinner....especially if my wife is cooking.... :cool: